"Uh, Mrs. Cake? Pinkie is digging a hole outside the shop. Thought you should know."
> Mrs. Cake sighs and shakes her head
> "Poor mare. I remember my digging days, it felt like it would go on forever."
> You raise your eyebrows
"So this is something ponies just...do?"
> The baker nods
> "There comes a time in a mare's life when you feel empty, like a shore without a sea. Digging a hole helps fill the space in your heart, a little bit. And if some handsome stallion happens to climb in..."
> You tilt your head
"I think I get it. So, uh, is there anything we can do for Pinkie? It doesn't sound like a fun time."
> Mrs. Cake grins
> "Nothing I can do, but I think she would love to hear how concerned you are about her."
> You roll your eyes
"Subtle. Still, what kind of friend would I be if I left her alone like this?"
> Mrs. Cake smiles fondly at you
> "You're a good colt, Anon. Never change."

> You stare down into the 6ft deep hole
> Pinkie is swaying, her limp curls of her mane inflating and deflating 
> You glance around, but most ponies either ignore it, or send pitying looks at the hole
> You sigh, then sit cross-legged at the edge
"You alright, Ponks?"
> She looks up at you with wide eyes
> "Nonners? I mean, haha, yeah! Just, uh, just wanted to see what the dirt was like, you know, for party planning!"
> You raise your eyebrows
"That's some deep preparations."
> Pinkie Pie giggles, her mane inflating a bit more than usual
> "Yup! You have to plan the hole thing out in advance!"
> You chuckle
"Well, I don't want to dig too deep into your business."
> The party mare wiggles her hoof in a so-so gesture
> "Eeeeeeeeehhh, half points for using "deep" again. Anywhoodles, what brings you to my dig doodles?"
> You scratch your cheek
"Mrs. Cake told me a little about digging days? I don't entirely get it, but I figured you could use some company to keep your mind off things."
> Pinkie beams at you
> "That's super de-duper sweet! And I would know!"
> You grin
"Thanks, Ponks. Hey, I'm going to go get some grub, then I'll be right back."
> Pinkie wiggles happily
> "Good idea! I'll be right here, so come back quick!"
> You can't help but get caught up in her cheerfulness
> You get up with a grunt and start jogging towards the Apple stall
> You're going to need a decent amount of food, and it has to be cheap and able to drop a fair distance, so apples it is
> Even though the mare can eat like Scooby Doo, you suspect she just has a stomach of holding for desserts
> When it comes to healthy foods, she just eats normal amounts
> Baffling
> Of course, after a few headaches, you followed the local wisdom and just stopped trying to figure out Pi-
> You stumble, skipping a bit to stop from falling on your face
> "Look at what you just did, Bloom! You nearly made Anon hurt himself!"
> You turn around to find Applejack glare over the counter of her stall at a pothole
> The pothole replies dejectedly,
> "Ah'm sorry, Anon. Ah didn't mean to do you no harm."
> You look down to find Apple Bloom at the bottom of a two-foot deep hole
"Uh, right. This that digging days thing again?"
> Applejack rolls her eyes
> "No it ain't, she just wanted to get some practice in. An' she'll fill that hole right back in if she knows what's good for her!"
> Apple Bloom clambers out of the hole, scrunching hard
> "Ah know, Ah know! Do you really have to yell at me in front of a stallion?"
> Applejack blinks, then tips her hat to you, her cheeks red with embarrassment
> "Beggin' you're pardon, Anon. Sorry you had to hear all that. Can Ah get you anything?"
> You smile and wave your hand dismissively
"It's fine, I don't mind. I would like two dozen apples, though."
> Applejack's hat rises in surprise
> "That'll be four bits, but uh, Ah can't help but notice you forgot your saddlebags. How about Apple Bloom helps carry 'em to where you going?"
> You pay the mare and eye the pile of apples
"That's not a bad idea. Lemme just..."
> You pull the hem of your shirt up, and scoop about half the apples into the makeshift sling
> Applejack's eyes flicker from the lumpy dip in your shirt to your face
> "Maybe Ah should just carry them all myself? Ah'd hate to stretch out a colt's clothes like that for no good reason."
> You shake your head
"Nah, don't worry about it, you still have a stall to run."
> Then you look down at your t-shirt and shrug
"The damage is done, and Rarity will only try to kill me a little. Ready, Apple Bloom?"
> The filly salutes
> "Yes sir! The cargo is locked and loaded!"
> You nod at her
"Autotrots, roll out!"
> Then you give Applejack a nod and a smile as you set off
"See you around, Applejack."
> She tips her hat 
> "Be careful not to fall in some mare's hole, alright?"
> You call out over your shoulder, 
"No promises!"
> She just chuckles and waves

> You can't help but watch Apple Bloom waddle along, her saddlebags almost dragging on the ground
"You alright down there?"
> She holds her head high and puffs out her little chest-tuft
> "Ain't no need to worry about me, Ah'm a big, strong mare! 'Sides, Ah carry way more apples at a time back home."
> You adjust your shirt and move one of the apples closer to the middle of the pile
"Really? How many can you handle?"
> Apple Bloom chews on her lip
> "Uh, fourteen, Ah reckon."
> You let out a low whistle
"That's a lot!"
> Apple Bloom beams at you
> "You betcha! Granny says it won't be long before Ah can pull the wagon!"
> You shake your head
> You've tried pulling that wagon, it's pretty heavy
> Then again, Earth Ponies are considerably stronger than they look
"They grow up so fast."
> Apple Bloom nods
> "Granny's been sayin' that too."
> As you approach Pinkie's hole, you realize you don't have anything to put the apples on
> Well, you can just brush off the dirt
"Just set them down by that hole, Apple Bloom."
> She blinks
> "Oh! Okay."
> The filly trots over and peeks over the edge
> "Hi Pinkie Pie!"
> You listen to them exchange pleasantries with half an ear as you set your load of apples down
> Apple Bloom empties her saddlebags with practiced ease, then gives you a salute
> "Payload delivered, Sir!"
> You salute back
"Payload received, private. You are dismissed. And good luck with your practice!"
> Apple Bloom blushes
> "Thanks. Um. I'll leave you two alone now."
> She gallops off, and you just shake your head
> You shrug, then sit down by the hole
"Want an apple, Ponko?"
> She wiggles her haunches 
> "You betcha! Fire at will!"
> You toss one down and she leaps to bite it out of the air
> You blink, and the whole thing is gone
> Pinkie spits out some seeds and a stem
> "Mmm, thanks!"
> You honestly can't tell if she's very hungry, or just rather Pinkie
"No problem. Want another?"
> She hums in contemplation
> "Nah, I'm good for now."
> You nod
> ...
> To be honest, you aren't really sure if you should ask about the digging thing, you have no idea how to deal with normal depression, let alone horse depression
> You mean, her hole, is just so big
> You can't believe it's just so round, it's like out there
> You mean geometric, look
> It's just so, deep
> "Sooooooooo..."
> You blink, pulled out of your reverie
"Yes?"
> "Wanna play I Spy?"
> You look down at the cheerful mare, then the hole which cuts off most of her line of sight
"...Sure."
> Pinkie rubs her hooves together in anticipation
> "Okie dokie! I spy, with my all-seeing eye... something brown!"
> Surely it's not the obvious thing
"Is it the shaft of the shovel?"
> She giggles
> "Nope! Guess again!"
> ...
"Is it dirt?"
> She gasps
> "How did you know?"
> You look at her with a deadpan expression
"Psychic powers."
> Her eyes go wide
> "Woooooooow, that's amazing! Okay, your turn!"
> You look around
> It's a fair bet that she knows the shops and landmarks around here
"I spy something white."
> Pinkie sits in lotus position, her forehooves pressed against her temples
> "Clouds?"
"Nope."
> "My teeth?"
"That's a negatory, pink friend."
> "Sugar Cube Corner!"
"Yup. Your turn."
> Her eyes dart around the hole
> "I spy with my third eye... something cute!"
> Your heart sinks
> You just got tricked
> Backstabbed, or quite possibly, bamboozled
> Something Pinkie Pie finds cute? That could be anything!
 "The shovel?"
> "Nuh-uh!"
"The clouds?"
> "Youplayit, Pinkie on the bottom, nope on top!"
> You frown
> Pinkie did mention a third eye
"Apple Bloom 5 minutes ago?"
> The party mare giggles
> "No, silly, I can't see her right now."
> Well, that doesn't leave many possibilities 
"The dirt again?"
> "That'd be a good fake-out, huh. Too bad that's wrong!"
"The sky?"
> "Nopers Nonners!"
> You sigh
"I give up. What is it?"
> Pinkie grins
> "It's you!"
> You groan
"I totally forgot abo-"
> Hold up
> She's saying you're cute
> You blush, a hand automatically covering your mouth
> "Ehehehe, I spy something pink!"
> The folks at immigration told you about this
> They said the mares are clever and strike without warning
> You should have listened
"Th-that's not fair!"
> "Oho, has somepony finally gotten the better of our favorite janefilly?"
> You look to find Rarity trotting towards you with an amused smile
> Pinkie jumps up above the rim of the hole
> "Hi Rarity!"
> She falls back down, then jumps again
> "Isn't he the cutest?"
> You purse your lips, not sure what kind of face you'll make
"I am not cute."
> Rarity raises an eyebrow, wearing a smug smile
> "Truly? This is news to me, Darling. At any rate, I thought I would drop by when I heard Pinkie was digging, but I see you have the situation well in hoof, or hand as it were."
> Pinkie jumps again
> "Thanks! I-"
> Jump
> "Appreciate it!"
> Rarity seems about to leave, but you speak
"Say, do all ponies have digging days? Unicorns and pegasi too?"
> Rarity flicks her tail
> "We do have something similar. Pegasi build nests out of colorful and shiny things. After Rainbow Dash raided my inspiration room, I just leave a box of scraps and gem shards outside."
> You smile
"That's nice of you. What about unicorns then?"
> She examines her forehoof, her tail swishing back and forth in a way you recognize as embarrassment
> "We, ah, find the highest perch we can and consider our place in the universe."
> Pinkie Pie flops halfway onto the rim of the hole
> "I remember that! You were on top of  Town Hall and were all like, 'Wahahaha! Cower before me, unfabulous mortals!' "
> Rarity blushes
> "Yes, well. I really must get going. It was good to see you, Anon, and I'm glad you're feeling better, Pinkie."
> Pinkie wiggles her forehooves
> "Bye bye, dark mistress of fashion!"
> You pat Rarity's withers
"It's too late for me, flee while you still can."
> She shakes her head
> "If you two had a colt, he would rival Discord for whimsy. Good luck Darlings!"
> Rarity vanishes in a burst of sparkles and high class laughter
> You roll your eyes
"Like she's one to talk about whimsy. Right, Panko Pe?"
> "R-right."
> You look down to see Pinkie blushing like a tomato, slowly sliding back into the hole
> You poke her cheek
"You alright there?"
> She squeaks, flails, then falls down with a thump
"Oh crap!"
> You hurriedly drop down after her
> Pinkie winces, rubbing her flank
> "Good thing I got so much cushion in my tush-in!"
> She laughs a little shakily
> You frown in concern
"Should I go get a doctor or something?"
> She gets to her hooves, wincing
> "Nah, I think my fruity patooty is just bruised. Wanna kiss it better?"
> You roll your eyes
"It certainly sounds like you'll be fine."
> Pinkie grins 
> "Worth a try!"
> She almost goes to sit down again, then winces
> You frown, sitting down cross-legged and patting your lap
"Come here, lay down. It's better than the dirt."
> She blushes lightly and trots over
> It takes her a little to get comfortable,    rolling onto her back and wiggling a bit
> The mare is kinda heavy and warm, but it's not so bad
> You automatically start rubbing her belly, and she positively melts
"That better?"
> Penka Po hums in contentment
> "Mmm, yeah, that's the stuff."
> For your part, you still can't get over how soft and smooth their fur is
> You lose track of time, just petting her fur and watching her twitch a leg from time to time
> It's comfortable, in the shade of the hole wall, listening to the murmur of passing ponies going about their day
> Eventually, your arm gets tired, and you just rest your hand on her soft tummy
> "Nonny?"
"Yeah, Pinkie?"
> Her stomach growls
> "I could go for another apple right now."
> You nod seriously, only smiling a little bit
"So I hear. But you'll have to get off my lap if you want me to get you one."
> She pouts
> "But this is a once-in-a-lifetime thing, Nonny! If I leave your lap now, I might never get to get your sweet, sweet belly rubs again!"
> You nod seriously
"That is a pretty difficult problem there, Ponks. What if, now hear me out, we eat some food, then I sit down and you lay in my lap, and belly rubs happen again?"
> She squints at you, rubbing her chin
> "That just might work!"
> You chuckle
"It's crazy, I know. But I think we can pull it off."
> Prencissa Piana rolls onto her hooves, bouncing in place as you get to your feet
> You stare up at the rim of the hole, just high enough that you will have some trouble getting up
"In retrospect, I should have brought a ladder or something."
> Pinkie puffs out her chest tuft
> "We don't need a ladder, you've got me!"
> You blink
"That's true, I'll just-"
> She jumps completely out of the hole,  then turns around and reaches out a foreleg to you
"-grab on, I guess."
> "Yuppers!"
> You reach up and put one hand on the rim, and hold on to her foreleg with the other
"One, two, thr-"
> Pynekey Poi hauls you up with a grunt, and you actually catch some air before you land on your feet
> You shake your head in awe
"Dang, girl. You're freaking strong!"
> She grins
> "You betcha! Ain't no mare like an earth pony party mare!"
> You dust off your pants
"I'll say."
> You bend down, pick up an apple, and dust it off on your shirt
"Thanks, Pinkie."
> You toss it to her
> She snaps it out of the air, caught between her teeth
> "Wou're wewow, wowwy!"
> You chuckle and start cleaning off an apple of your own
> Between the two of you, you manage to finish off about a third of what you bought
> Pinkie licks the apple juice from off her lips
> You crack your neck
"Well, shall we go back down, Pinkie?"
> She tilts her head, tail twitching a little
> "Mmm, I don't think so. I'm not feeling hole-y mole-y anymore."
> You smile
"Glad to hear it. What are you going to do now?"
> She chews on her lip, blushing lightly
> "Well, I might have to do some special preparations, depending."
> You start picking up the apples
"Oh? Depending on what?"
> Pinkie Pie takes a deep breath, then looks you straight in the eye
> "If you would like to go on a date with me."
> You blink in surprise, not even sure what to think
> But you feel a warmth in your chest that tells you all you need to know
"Yeah, Pinkie. I think I would like that."
> Her eyes go wide, and her mane inflates almost to the breaking point
> "R-really?"
> You smile, feeling your face warm up
"Yeah, really. You're a fun mare, and I like hanging out with you."
> Pinkie grins, vibrating in place 
> "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! This is really happening! Okay, well, I gotta get everything ready, so I gotta go and do that and and-"
> You boop her nose
"Just let me know when you're picking me up, okay?"
> She comes to a stop and takes a deep breath
> "Be ready by eight! And bring a rubber chicken!"
> You nod
"Eight, and rubber chicken. Got it."
> She squeals happily and disappears in a puff of smoke
> You shake your head at her antics, a smile stuck on your face
> You turn to look at the hole, but it's mysteriously filled in
> When?
> You had your eyes on her the entire time!
> Maybe she wasn't vibrating, you were only seeing her afterimage?
> ...
> No, no use trying to figure it out
> Anyways, you have a rubber chicken to buy and a date to go on
> You pick up the rest of the apples and set off, a vibrant warmth lingering in your chest long after you get back home